Why men date other marrieds?
Chat about a loaded theme that no one wants to talk about, that’s it. Funny thing, affairs have been going on ever since ancient times. Extramarital affairs can be burdened with troubles, cause despair, and other problems. In addition you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and openness matter, money, age difference, spiritual education, remorse, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this post I should define an affair as a long term, maybe decades long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, lonely wife looks for dating.
Why do married people have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are seeking affair. I suppose typically though it is just the human condition, the need for liking, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a several explanations I have run across.
In nature we as humans are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and exciting, and sex makes us flee the real world for a brief period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Someone can turn the craving on and off, some are good at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and elder, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the stimulation of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another individual, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos culture has erected against affairs. For many people the yearnings will overcome their fears and make them risk the anger of not only their family, but the public also. So why, what is the catalyst?
Sex Addicts, probably some of us are. Sex is terribly pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically motivated sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not wound your family or anybody else? You will need to minimize the risk you are taking. If you have the approach that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the largest group, enormous truly. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, but they feel comfy in the manner they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Also there are the children to consider. Your finances are so entwined. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live jointly besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that prevent them implementing the sex act, at least not with their othere half. An extramarital affair occasionally solves the difficulty while keeping the marriage intact.
Neglect, sorrowfully this is a common cause I fear. One or the other, usually the guy is sexually neglecting his wife for a multitude of reasons. As a man I actually am thankful to you guys neglecting your wives and making them available to us men of romance, making them “milfs” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, could be compassion is gone, maybe it is the intimacy, maybe neglect. Maybe we have simply grown separately, our common interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is opposed to of what you want. Could be I just don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The major reason people give is, they look for the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to get away, for financial gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair